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Posts Tagged ‘Family Life’

IMG_20130419_184934It may have been someones birthday this weekend, someone who doesn’t like big fusses or even really acknowledging that it is happening! But on this particular birthday this year, someone may have had an awesome time, may have even enjoyed it! (Don’t worry there will be a bigger blog post about the awesomeness!). Just thought I would share a little taster, well actually a big tasty ‘oh my word, I want it again’ taster of the day!

Team Lloyd

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At the end of March (within three days of each other) Monkey and Mouse had birthdays. With the parties and celebrating, work, holiday and more work I am only now getting to write this!  Mouse turned 3 and her older brother 5, I cant believe I no longer have a baby!

We did, however have a fantastic time celebrating! I managed to have the time off work; we had Pastries for Breakfast, a joint Fancy Dress party complete with bouncy castle and caterpillar jelly, time with family, lots of cuddles, food at Frankie and Benny’s and more! It was like a four day birthday!

Birthday Montage 2013

The kids had a whale of a time, I really enjoyed seeing them so smiley and really relishing their time with people they love, however I do of course have to get my head around them being another year older which is always tough!

Just a couple of quick notes to the kids!

Dear Monkey, my big 5 year old!

Happy Birthday, another year older and my how you have grown up in the last year! You started school in September and are doing amazingly well. You are so enthusiastic to learn and have made lots of friends! You are a very smart little boy especially with the way you have grasped Maths and reading! You can be serious, but that is you, always observing, always learning. When you play using your imagination it is amazing to see, your cheekiness keeps everyone smiling and when you really let go and laugh, you light up a room in a second! Keep smiling mister, you’re awesome and we love it!

Love you lots and always will, Mummy xx

 

Dear Mouse,

I can’t believe that you are now 3, no longer my baby! You started five mornings of nursery this term and you can’t wait to go every morning. You are developing so fast and are following your brother in your learning, another one who has a head for Maths! You are beautiful and your smile can make anyones day! You are so cuddly and always have a kiss (or seven) for Mummy and Daddy! Keep on being you mouse, you are awesome!

Love you lots and always will, Mummy xx

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This week for photo of the week had to be one  from the phone! Mouse has been dropping her afternoon nap and for the last two weeks has gone completely without them, apart from the day after we had got back from Butlins! We had nipped out in the car and she was dozing in her seat, when we got back, asked her if she wanted to go to bed for a nap, she said no but two minutes later fond this! Think the holiday must have worn her out!

Team Lloyd

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Something happened that I will never forget.

Something happened that I don’t talk about much with anyone other than Hubby but actually it had a massive impact on our life.

Something happened that I can’t share many details of because of a legal agreement, but that I need to talk about.

Something happened that I am struggling to forgive.

We were a relatively newly married couple (less than two years) and we had a nine month old baby. Two people who we considered friends did something that turned our life upside down. For them it was about money, it was about making something theirs and no longer shared. It left hubby without a job, I was coming to the end of maternity leave, it left us without a choice. I had to go back to work, Hubby was to look after our son full time. It wasn’t the plan, but it wasn’t a choice. We had to do what we could to stay afloat financially, I had a job waiting, I couldn’t not go to it when we needed to pay the bills.

Everything died down for a couple of months, then two days before my 30th birthday they decided to have another go, just to make sure we were at rock bottom! They ruined my birthday, they took the last bit of trust in people we had.

It was still about money for them, we just wanted to be left alone, to be able to get on with our lives, but they needed to make sure they had hurt us, they left us struggling to cope.  We did struggle, but we did cope, we got through together because that’s what we do.

A couple more months down the line, we fell pregnant with bundle of joy number two. I again went on Maternity Leave, we carried on coping, not always being able to afford the best, or even the worst, but we got by.  We even started to think that maybe we could go back to the original plan of me at home and hubby working

Hubby continued to look for work; but the jobs weren’t there, the job market as a whole was claiming more victims to redundancy, people were not hiring (they still aren’t). So for a second time I went back to work. I have gone in day by day missing bits of the kids growing up. I was lucky that both crawled bang on six months, both walked at 9 months so I was witness to those, but other stuff I have missed. I have been surprised when they have done something small and probably insignificant, jumped off a step, counted one more than I had heard before, something that was new to me, only to see that look in hubby’s eyes that just said ‘sorry’ as it wasn’t new after all.

I once cried, sobbed for an hour because Monkey couldn’t understand why I couldn’t go to an event at school, he probably doesn’t even remember it now, but I do….I always will. I remember the look in his eyes, the tears on his cheeks, the heaving sobs I let out, unable to hide my sadness at missing it.

Monkey is at school now and I want to do the School runs. I know for most they are a nightmare, but I feel sad that I have missed so many of them. Mouse will be going up to 15 hours nursery very shortly and I feel that is an end of an era. They are both so big now, I just hope that they know that I have always tried to be there, working a long day to be able to leave early and see their Christmas Play, that I have worked through lunch to be able to take them on their first days of big school/nursery/anything.

I have spent years trying to forgive the ‘friends’, I have spent time trying to forget. But you see the problem is, it was never about money for us, it was about trust, and what they have taken from me is far more precious than money, it was something I can never get back, something that I would have traded anything for, it was time with my children.

I know that being bitter about it only really hurts me. It doesn’t affect them, they probably don’t even think about it any more, they got what they wanted and moved on! I need to let it go, I need to ‘get over it’, I need to forgive and forget I guess, but how do you forgive something like that?

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I am not sure who is more excited, the kids, me or the hubby!  We can’t believe it has come around so quickly, Three more sleeps…or maybe three more nights of excited tossing and turning non sleep until we head off on our Butlins Ambassadors trip!

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We can’t wait, the last three months have been tough. We seem to have picked up every illness going, work has been stressful and some days I really struggle with not having quality time with the family. So, this holiday is an opportunity to spend a lot of time together, have some fun and hopefully relax!

We are heading to the Shoreline Hotel in Bognor Regis for some Easter fun, we are looking forward to so much, at the minute we are not sure how we are going to fit it all in!

Of course, whilst we are there, we have a job to do!  We are there to report back to you what it is like to have a break at Butlins! The kids will mainly be testing the entertainment, the hubby has the job of food critique and me? Well, anything to do with relaxation…the hotel room, the ease of the week, the little things that only mums notice!

So what do you really want to know? Have you visited before and want to know if something has changed? Do you particularly want to know about the hotels? Let me know and I will try and answer all!

 

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A strange one maybe, but the last few days have been spent mostly preparing for a joint birthday party for Monkey and Mouse including the food! There was so much to do and this was just a part of it!

Team Lloyd

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Team Lloyd

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